Just Lucky, I Guess - Sue

Oh my God. My expensive Asus computer acted like a plastic souvenier trinket from Taiwan and blue-screened. Clutching my chest with the first signs of internet withdrawal, I fired up the air compressor and vacuumed the old Takes a Beating and Keeps on Ticking Gateway. I'll have to call PC911 and report the hard drive or processor failure or whatever the FUCK it decided to fail with this time. After replacing the power supply, and now having to replace everything else, it'll be a brand new desktop that I should actually be able to USE. Of course, it won't be an Asus anymore, but that will be what Martha calls a "good thing."

I have officially made one corner of the living room presentable for the new furnace installers today. They're going to walk away and say, "Hey Luis, did you get a load of that one corner of the living room? That corner of the ceiling is so clean, you could manufacture microprocessors on it."

If I don't lose 50 pounds before this house is clean, I'm going to donate myself to science to study as a genetic anomaly. Yesterday, we went to HD and bought a 24 pack of microfibre cleaning cloths. They are super absorbent and can be used either wet or dry. We hopped over to OD and got foam board and double sticky tape to afix to the wall for photos. Got home, steam cleaned the couch. I would say 95% of Lisle came off. We put the boards up. Then Dan, the furnace man, came over to light the pilot, which had mysteriously self-extinguished last spring two days before the warm came. We were lucky!

"No good," says Dan. "See all that stuff in there? Your heat exchanger is shot."

Phyllis and I looked. Yep, it was shot alright. Dan wasn't saying it was going to kill us, or the dogs, or the cats, or the birds. He wasn't saying it was the end of the world. Phyllis and I exhaled. Whew! "I'm just saying you need a new furnace."

I wanted to ask, "How much cream is that going to scrape off the top of our pail of milk?" But he wasn't done.

"I'm not saying I'm the cheapest in town," he said. "But I will say I'm the best!" And there we were, like two Powerball winners, lucky again! The best furnace man in all of metro Denver and the entire front range had fallen on our doorstep in our time of need. Dan added, "I don't know how to break this to you, but your air convection is not up to code."

I told him that he was the expert and we would seriously consider whatever he recommended. Still feeling lucky, I boldly asked him how much a new furnace job might run. He went out to his van to crunch some numbers. Phyllis and I quickly agreed that no matter how much it was, we would pay it. We would pay it because we are two desperate  people who were once riding high, but were now out of choices and down on our luck.

And I still have to call PC911.

Dennis Has a New Blog! Jeff Does, Too!

Ok, so enough about Jeff and Dennis. We wanted to cover a portion of one of the living room walls with cork so we could have a versatile photo gallery. We settled on some foam core board. It was half the price and it’s working out ok. We haven’t put up many pictures yet.

Ok, some more about Jeff and Dennis. Did I mention they have new blogs? Ok, enough about them. Sue works all night and is wide awake when I’m waking up. As soon as I woke up yesterday morning, Sue wanted to rearrange the furniture. And so with my cup of coffee in one hand, we tore it all apart and moved the pieces all around. I like it. It feels new and different. The new, different look gave us the idea to get the foam board to make our versatile photo gallery.

So, about Jeff and Dennis… eh. Enough about them. I can’t talk about anything we have done this week without mentioning the new super, heavy-duty steam cleaner Sue bought. We cleaned the wall, the wall that we hung the foam core board for our versatile photo gallery, with the super, heavy-duty steam cleaner. She really gets ‘er clean! We did the leather sofa with it, too. I read somewhere that Sue cleans her teeth with it. That explains why her lips are chapped.

Jeff and Dennis are my brothers and they both have blogs with one post on them. But enough about them. We had a guy over today to light the pilot light in our furnace and check everything out. One half hour and $2200 later, we had a new furnace. Well, we will tomorrow. He kept saying, “It’s not the end of the world.” “Your furnace is 30 years old, but it’s not the end of the world. These couplers are shot, but it’s not the end of the world. You have no vents in your attic, but it’s not the end of the world.” So when he gave us the estimate, Sue and I both thought, in unison, “It’s not the end of the world.” He looked at us knowingly and we all agreed silently.

Tonight, Sue’s computer is kaput. That is a problem because Sue has exchanged vows with her computer and they are committed to one another. But like a lot of relationships, she has a couple of spares on the side…an extra tower and a laptop. So she will get through this. We have a pc guy who has already made several trips to our house. He’ll be coming back again. We like him and he likes us.

I wait and watch daily for Jeff and Dennis to write in their blogs. Will it be today? Will it be tomorrow? I just might have to un-friend them.