I threw my lunch together, tossed it in the car and took off. I had to get to work before Ms. Prissy Pants and get that note off her desk. I thought it was funny when I wrote it, but if she throws a fit, I could be fired. I’ve heard it a million times. When you write a note like that, hold on to it awhile. The recipient will not think it as funny as I did. “Goddamnit, why am I so hot-headed?” I thought.
I was approaching a parking lot driveway. The blue car appeared to be going to turn into the lane in front of me. I stopped. “OK! Go!” I waved it the go-ahead. The blue car was in front of me now. “Please let me get to work before Ms. Prissy Pants.” The light ahead turned yellow. The blue car could have made it thru, but it stopped instead.
“Shit!” I sat thru the yellow light and thru the red light. The light turned green and the blue car just sat there. I hit my horn. “Move, goddammit!” I hit my horn again and the blue car came back to life and started moving. A steady stream of oncoming traffic kept me trapped behind. My urgency seemed to make this car go even slower. “Jesus Christ!” I hit the steering wheel with my fist.
My mind was going forty miles per hour. The blue car was going twenty. It’s right turn signal came on and it slowed down even more. “Don’t roll it!” I yelled. “Thank God it’s going to turn.” We went several blocks like this then, for no reason I could see, it changed it’s mind and the turn signal went off. “Son of a BITCH!” I yelled. “Will you MOVE!”
As the blue car crawled along at 20 miles per hour, it was also intermittently hitting it’s breaks. It appeared to be breaking for shadows. “Jesus Christ Goddamn son of a bitch! What are you doing!” Another red light turned green and the blue car wasn’t paying attention. I laid on the horn. I could see the startled driver look into the rear view mirror, then start moving at the pace of a snail. I could feel my blood pressure crescendo and the top of my head ready to spin off into orbit. I was rocking back and forth in the driver’s seat. “Goddammit. goddammit. goddammit. goddammit.”
Finally, there was a short break in the oncoming traffic. I jerked the wheel to the left and sped up even with the blue car. The driver turned her head and looked at me just as I was hit head-on by an oncoming car. I recognized the driver just before I died. It was me.
